I was cleaning up the house, getting it ready for some new friends to come over, when my wife came home and said, “Mark, you haven’t taken care of your piles on the bar yet!” Before I even had time to think, the words came out of my mouth, “I took care of some of them.” And what flew through my mind to say next was an accompanying accusation – You haven’t put away your ironing board either!
I was then immediately struck by how quickly I can be defensive! What would I do next? What would YOU do next?
I PAUSED!
I chided myself for how poorly I sometimes live out what I preach.
Then I set out to PLEDGE: “Hun – you sound frustrated, tell me what you are thinking…” (An effort to further my understanding of her, having re-listened in my head to what she had just said.)
And the conversation took a turn for the good. I listened further, echoed more, and then disarmed the tension between us by validating what she said.
It is THAT easy to fall off the wagon, and THAT easy to get back on.
Practice getting back on the PLEDGEtalk wagon when you fall off this week and reply to this to let me know how it goes!
Mark Oelze
Author/Creator of PLEDGEtalk
Learn more at: www.pledgetalk.com
